_ なんだか最近売れている本もあるようだし、「意識は無意識の決定を追尾しているだけで、肉体に命令を下しているわけではない。意識は人格の中心ではなく、テクニカルな挿画ほどのものだ」という知見も、やがて常識になっていくのだろうか。
_ この解釈を支持する実験データが一般書でも紹介され始めたのは、８〜９年前あたりだったか。新鮮な切り口には軽薄に飛びつく習性だが、そのときは躊躇した。その認識による人生観の変更がけっこう大規模なので、難儀な作業になりそうだったからだ。どっか抜け道がないかなあとうじうじ悪あがきした。
落ち着いて考えてみれば、解釈・加工済みの単なる表象にもし判断の実権があるのなら、我々は実際よりもっとトロくさ〜い生き物であるはずで、内省的にもさほどの悪あがきの余地はなかったわけだが。
_ 無意識がきっちりやることをやって、それを俯瞰的な体験の像に加工して意識に送り込むまで約0.5秒のタイムラグがあるそうだが、意識には「0.5秒前にはこんなことしたよ」という報告ではなく「これが今俺がやってること」という設定で届くので、意識のほうは自分のいる映画館が二番館であることには気づかない。ただし、マジ危機一髪のシチュエーションでは、無意識は意識にかまってる場合じゃなくなってしまって、そのあおりで無意識のほうの異様に高速の処理過程が、意識のほうに漏れ出してきたりもする。
_ うーむと納得してから、この表象の私に自己同一性の基盤をおくことはやめてみることにしたのだが、かと言って、「これ」と指し示すことができないものに移し換えるのも難しい。いろいろとあらわれる既成の常識との齟齬も厄介だ。人生の指針となるものがない。導きがないと踏み迷ってしまうところが我ながら情けない。
けれども、ごく稀にだが、おや一足先にご苦労なさっておられる方がいる、と感じることがないでもない。
特にバーナデット・ロバーツの『自己喪失の体験』と、クリシュナムルティの『瞑想録』は、以前読んだときとはまるで印象が違って、確か前にも落ちたのだが、また別のウロコが眼から落ちた。
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